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How to Make A Relationship Work – Tips that Differentiate Giants from Grasshoppers

I don’t always feel intellectually satiated in my blog posts, if I don’t quote the scriptures.

Geneses 2:18 (Kjv)

And the Lord God said, it is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him (read – helper suitable for him).

I must admit that this is one of my favorite verses in the bible. Not for any other reason than the powerful sentiments that can only be discerned by a keen eye. But let me make it simpler for you by explaining every bit – microscopically.

…and the Lord God said –

I am careful not to add any meaning to this, but folks, if God says something, we just have to listen.

…it is not good that the man should be alone

Plain and simple – and it has nothing to do with gender biasness. Even the ladies shouldn’t be alone. And when God Himself says that it is not good, my friend – it is not (pun intended.)

I (God) will make him a helper suitable for him

What more can you ask from the Lord. He said He will do it, and trust me, He will. And we are talking about:

  • A helper – not a boss
  • Suitable match – not a forced love
  • Made by God, I repeat. Made by God – though religion has been so underrated nowadays. We’ll talk about that in another blog post.

But what does this have to do with you? What is the significance of all this?

Well, I’ll tell you a fascinating story.

Not so long ago, I received a phone call from a friend. And he was like, “Doc, why is it that a relationship will start on a high note – but after dating for sometime and enjoying fun moments, either of the partners decide to belittle your time and commitment in the relationship?”

Sounds weird being asked such a question. I mean, I’m not a relationship counsellor – maybe I am. But wait…

…my little story ends there. I won’t go into the details of the conversation. Here is something for you though.

Strange world we live in. Full of trouble, sorrows and heartbreaks. But one thing is for sure. Love cures all manner of pain.

What if you love someone and they don’t love you back? As in, you might have a friend who doesn’t regard you as a friend. It happens. Which is why I’ve prepared for you tips on how to make a relationship work. Life lessons:


  1. See your life (pun intended).

I don’t mean to sound crazy, but – how did you and your partner even get here? What sort of decisions made your relationship start plummeting in a downward trend? I must admit, you need to change your way of thinking to get out of this one.

One mistake that ladies make is loving someone hoping that they will change for the better. Men don’t change easily for the “better”. Say 96% of the times. The 4% is under divine intervention, which doesn’t help much if you are not prayerful.

Men make the same mistake. They love a lady hoping that she won’t change. But bro, ladies are the most adaptable creatures I know. If you treat her right, she blooms. If you don’t, she wilts. Just like a rose.

The lesson is this:

  • You can’t change a man. So, make your decisions right before he starts promising you heaven and earth.
  • Nothing makes a lady blossom like a peace of mind, care, commitment and love. Don’t complain that she changed, man. It’s your fault. Haha.
  1. He (she) doesn’t love you? – Pray about it

You ever heard the phrase, “prayer open doors which no man can shut.” Yes, it does. Stress the word “…no man can shut.”

I was once told a joke:

That someone prayed to God to bless his lady and He blessed her with another man. Hahaha

Come on! Prayers can’t do that. Really, I just won’t stop laughing.

But God is faithful. If you make His business your business, He will surely make your business His business. All you need is a little faith. About the size of a mustard seed.

  1. Take time and bond

I’ve lost count of the number of people in relationships who when asked about their best friends can’t/won’t mention their partners. That’s the epitome of hypocrisy. That person won your heart. Literally. And they are not your best friend? No no!

There’s so much you can do together. Like:

  • Going to church.
  • Getting the groceries.
  • Reading together.
  • Recreational activities.
  • Catching a movie.
  • Visiting friends.
  • Going out to dinner.

The list is just endless. These are the surest ways of knowing each other better. It may seem impossible at first, especially when your ego is bigger than the size of your house. But the results are worth being proud of if you take your time to acclimatize.

  1. Communicate, my friend. Communicate!

This is a digital age. Let me give you some statistics:

At least 62% of the population worldwide owns a mobile phone. An average youth between age 18 and 24 check their phone 74 times in a day. Those aged between 25and 34 do so about 50 times in a day and those aged between 35 and 44 check the devices roughly 35 times in day. That’s insane, don’t you think?

At least you can use that opportunity to check up on your loved one, once in a while. Just to let them know that you are thinking about them. Communication breakdown in a relationship is as dangerous as a chatterbox rumormonger with a funny name.

You may be wondering what there is to talk about. Well, figure it out… did you say you know each other better? I think you did. Maybe you didn’t. But you just thought about it now, huh? Gotcha!


It really takes a lot of patience and commitment with prayer to make a relationship work. Don’t be a common person. Pray. You may not be having someone to pray for right now but pray that God gives you a helper suitable for you.

Relationships require a strong willpower and a conscious mind set. And just as one of my friends said it:

You either go hard. Or go home.

I should become a relationship counselor. Don’t you think? Haha

School is out folks. School is out.

Let me know your thoughts in the comment section.



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